Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty-Five.

NYC - Manhattan

Why do we try to heal ourselves
Before we see the healer?

Afraid of our own weaknesses
Dare not let pride wane.

Fearful the makeshift masks will bleed
Dry pure, wash off, be plain.

Why do we try to prepare for our healing
Before we see the healer?

Contorted control of what needs to be wild
Comforted vaguely by the feigned.

Wanting to please, to be seen for our good
While cauterizing the needle with the vein.

Why do we fear the change from healing
Before we see the healer?

Scars from experience remind us of our own memories
All we can do is focus on being sane.

The shovel is waiting in its own image
Where all we can sense is the way out of pain.

Why don’t we just dabble with healing
Because the healer is nothing to fear?

The regal lion says it will fuck you up
As a proud Leo, I know my own mane.

The regal lion too sees with a keen eye
He clearly has no desire to reign.

Why don’t we use our own courage as medicine
Because the healer can only do so much?

Commitment phobic to anything but adventure
Climbing pyroclastic peaks in the rain.

Trusting fools and falling blind to faults
Fantasy found its home in vain.

Why don’t we see that we are the healer
Because the healer is a guide on the path?

Something to heal just means there is more road ahead
Streets in the center are always called “Main.”

How beautiful it is that we must go downtown
For that is where we discover our gold to gain.

Old poem called, The Healer. I CANNOT WAIT FOR THIS NEW MOON, FULL MOON, NEW MOON SITUATION IN LEO AND/OR AQUARIUS! Working on the next Inklings series, which will be more up your alley. And mine. Been a struggle to do this series I had such ideas for. Oh well, it is good to try new ideas regardless, right?

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Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty-Three + Day Twenty-Four.

I didn’t tell you I untangled myself
From the tango with the red leash.
I didn’t tell you I was running
From the zip line and its breeze.
I didn’t tell you I met Adam
From the alley, on the eve
Of a midsummer midnight in mountain land…
I didn’t tell you I never lost sleep.

I didn’t tell you because I did what was right
In my heart, not my mind,
It showed me
I didn’t tell you it displayed
A go-big-or-go-home sign for you
I didn’t tell you
Because you’re more scared and scarred than me.

I didn’t tell you how unbelievable you are
I didn’t tell you, never said
That I was mostly detached
Knowing where you were at
And I didn’t tell you
How much it killed me.

I didn’t tell you I was your mother
I didn’t tell you that I died
I didn’t tell you about this painful loss-
Reborn from the Middle Ages, my son
I didn’t tell you just how you were my pride.

I lied-
I lied by omission.
You did the same for me
I didn’t tell you this thing…

I didn’t tell you I loved you
From the moment we first met
I didn’t tell you because I’m not crazy.

I can see, and sense, and feel you…
That doesn’t go away with time…

I didn’t tell you – you never asked me.

Image by Marlena McGuigan, “Cutting Cords”
Copyright © 2016 Maieutic•Arts. All rights reserved.

This weekend was something. I figured I would post another old poem, called All Unspoken, with a new picture + a new meaning of nails in my tires. Two of them, both old tires, both the back tires. Still good. Still have a light at my core. And, so do my tires – despite the damage attempted. We are approaching a New Moon 🌙  yay!

July 15th + July 16th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty-One + Day Twenty-Two.

 

I am SUPER late on this post. In the midst of some necessary business adjustments + updates (website, booking/calendar, etc.). I caught a clear glimpse of the Moon tonight…and then some unknown creatures scurried past me. No, not bunnies. I saw them run first. It was my cue to go inside and write this post. 

July 13th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty.

I am your leftovers.
I am what you consumed
I am what you threw out
I am your ideal convenience
Your added sugar
Your cheap labor
Your nutty and granola
Wild Child.

I am your leftovers.
I am your quick and easy snatch
I am your powdered doughnut
I am your fresh fruit smoothie
Your parts
Your whole
Your mountain and pile of
Scape Goat Crisps.

I am your leftovers.
I am your creation of trash
I am out of sight
I am out of mind
Your shadow in slavery
Your illusion of progress
You packaged my perfection
And I am called a deal.

I am your leftovers.
Keep feeding me
And I will keep feeding you.

The moon is still waning, and I am probably still whining. It’s late, and I had some wine, at least. I am re-posting poems (this one was called Package Deal) that I feel to post for the moment in this series (from my “personal” blog). Felt consumed by Mother Earth’s pain from our consumerism today – more than usual. Hopefully something upbeat tomorrow…!

July 12th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Nineteen.

How Many Times

How many times
Can one be told they aren’t good enough
Before they believe it.

How many times
Can one hold their head in their hands
Before the tears dry.

How many times
Can one trust in hope
Before they don’t trust at all.

How many times
Can one justify their actions
Before self-harm becomes a habit.

How many times
Can one have nothing to show
Before they stop trying to feel seen.

How many times
Can one give all of their heart
Before the pump stops the scarlet fuel.

How many times, I ask
How many times before we get sick
From asking how many times.

How many times
Before we realize our fire burns in scarlet
And our heart is there to give to all.

How many times
Before we are seen for the light that we are
And we show nothing but power.

How many times
Before we habitually heal one another
Our actions justified by our hearts’ intentions.

How many times
Before we actually trust the Self
And we hope we are who we truly are and want to be.

How many times
Can one hold their head in their hands
And be so utterly grateful with joy.

How many times
I ask
Before we believe it.

Image courtesy of “kongsky” at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I am technically late on this Phases of the Moon post, but I don’t think I am actually “late.” How many times must I share this poem I wrote in 2015? I had a day. A good day. Alive. With others in their pain..and my own subsequently. It made me cry thinking about how easy it would be to just stand together as One – in spite of our differences. To care. To work together to make things easier for each other. To believe in ourselves more….

I read something a while back about how many people tend to fall back on or rely upon the idea that “we are only human.” As if to say we are less than…something else. What if we switched the mentality: “we are EXTRAORDINARILY human.” We create so much.

That’s it. The moon is waning and I probably sound like I am whining. Heartfelt post regardless. Let’s lift each other up, people. We all matter so much.

July 11th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Eighteen.

I’m barely making these arbitrary deadlines that I’ve created for myself. Ah well, I am going to finish this series one way or another! I have the next Inklings series in the works. It will be called “Recipes.” Unless I choose another idea that I have going.

Ahhh, it will be a surprise for all of us. But, the stick figures will be apart of the show regardless. Yes, “THE stick figures.” And, “THE show.” Like these things are a brand of something that no one else knows how to create.

Anyhow, the Moon is still waaaaaning. Maybe whining? I’m not sure. I worked with crying toddlers all day and cannot tell anymore. The image above doesn’t exactly portray where things are at with an 18-day-old Moon, but you get the idea.

July 10th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Seventeen.

Ahhh shit. It is technically day 18 as I post this day 17 moon information. I am quite focused on other things right now, but commitment is a thing. I am committed to this series (and my other series). Daily posts, regardless of others’ viewing is important to me. I felt to post on women + moon + cycles! We are in the waning cycle now….

Image + information credited to the website listed here: 

http://www.cycleharmony.com/stories/menstrual-myths-a-rituals/the-moon-cycle-and-the-menstrual-cycle

July 9th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Sixteen.

Don’t worry. This Phases of the Moon series will be done soon, and I will head back to the land of humor. Impermanence laws suggest that things change + fade away.

Ironically, this post was mysteriously altered/deleted as I was about to hit “Publish.” So. There’s that. (Sorry I didn’t fulfill my super special promise for this day).

Happy International Tarot Day + Full Moon in Capricorn!

July 8th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Fifteen.

That’s all I got for you tonight. Oh, and also I am now on Instagram @maieutic.arts.

Check out @zenbunni on Instagram!

July 7th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Fourteen.

I am going to do a strange thing. I am going to share a personal tarot drawing for this day in the Phases of the Moon series. I had so much synchronicity today…not unusual for me, but it felt like the “old me” was back in a (good) way. I chose these cards…

I chose a water 💦  – fire 🔥  – air sequence. Mystery (Scorpio/Pisces energy) + Courage (Leo energy) + Soul (any/all energy). I’ve been noticing my own fire/water energy more lately through life in general. I am mostly fire…then water… . . .  air is my weak link. But! Not my “soul” energy, that’s on lockdown for real.

What I get from this spread is more about my current chakra energy. My lower portion (below the heart) is in mystery. My heart center is strongly courageous. My upper portion is very connected to my the soul. The message is about bringing the missing element in: Earth. How can I bring all of this to Earth? How do I want to ground myself? 

It’s two days before the Full Moon in Capricorn + International Tarot Day. I have a feeling this series will be like climbing a mountain and coming back down (visually, at least).

July 6th, 2017.