Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty-Three + Day Twenty-Four.

I didn’t tell you I untangled myself
From the tango with the red leash.
I didn’t tell you I was running
From the zip line and its breeze.
I didn’t tell you I met Adam
From the alley, on the eve
Of a midsummer midnight in mountain land…
I didn’t tell you I never lost sleep.

I didn’t tell you because I did what was right
In my heart, not my mind,
It showed me
I didn’t tell you it displayed
A go-big-or-go-home sign for you
I didn’t tell you
Because you’re more scared and scarred than me.

I didn’t tell you how unbelievable you are
I didn’t tell you, never said
That I was mostly detached
Knowing where you were at
And I didn’t tell you
How much it killed me.

I didn’t tell you I was your mother
I didn’t tell you that I died
I didn’t tell you about this painful loss-
Reborn from the Middle Ages, my son
I didn’t tell you just how you were my pride.

I lied-
I lied by omission.
You did the same for me
I didn’t tell you this thing…

I didn’t tell you I loved you
From the moment we first met
I didn’t tell you because I’m not crazy.

I can see, and sense, and feel you…
That doesn’t go away with time…

I didn’t tell you – you never asked me.

Image by Marlena McGuigan, “Cutting Cords”
Copyright © 2016 Maieutic•Arts. All rights reserved.

This weekend was something. I figured I would post another old poem, called All Unspoken, with a new picture + a new meaning of nails in my tires. Two of them, both old tires, both the back tires. Still good. Still have a light at my core. And, so do my tires – despite the damage attempted. We are approaching a New Moon 🌙  yay!

July 15th + July 16th, 2017.

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Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty-One + Day Twenty-Two.

 

I am SUPER late on this post. In the midst of some necessary business adjustments + updates (website, booking/calendar, etc.). I caught a clear glimpse of the Moon tonight…and then some unknown creatures scurried past me. No, not bunnies. I saw them run first. It was my cue to go inside and write this post. 

July 13th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Twenty.

I am your leftovers.
I am what you consumed
I am what you threw out
I am your ideal convenience
Your added sugar
Your cheap labor
Your nutty and granola
Wild Child.

I am your leftovers.
I am your quick and easy snatch
I am your powdered doughnut
I am your fresh fruit smoothie
Your parts
Your whole
Your mountain and pile of
Scape Goat Crisps.

I am your leftovers.
I am your creation of trash
I am out of sight
I am out of mind
Your shadow in slavery
Your illusion of progress
You packaged my perfection
And I am called a deal.

I am your leftovers.
Keep feeding me
And I will keep feeding you.

The moon is still waning, and I am probably still whining. It’s late, and I had some wine, at least. I am re-posting poems (this one was called Package Deal) that I feel to post for the moment in this series (from my “personal” blog). Felt consumed by Mother Earth’s pain from our consumerism today – more than usual. Hopefully something upbeat tomorrow…!

July 12th, 2017.

Phases of the Moon: Day Nineteen.

How Many Times

How many times
Can one be told they aren’t good enough
Before they believe it.

How many times
Can one hold their head in their hands
Before the tears dry.

How many times
Can one trust in hope
Before they don’t trust at all.

How many times
Can one justify their actions
Before self-harm becomes a habit.

How many times
Can one have nothing to show
Before they stop trying to feel seen.

How many times
Can one give all of their heart
Before the pump stops the scarlet fuel.

How many times, I ask
How many times before we get sick
From asking how many times.

How many times
Before we realize our fire burns in scarlet
And our heart is there to give to all.

How many times
Before we are seen for the light that we are
And we show nothing but power.

How many times
Before we habitually heal one another
Our actions justified by our hearts’ intentions.

How many times
Before we actually trust the Self
And we hope we are who we truly are and want to be.

How many times
Can one hold their head in their hands
And be so utterly grateful with joy.

How many times
I ask
Before we believe it.

Image courtesy of “kongsky” at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I am technically late on this Phases of the Moon post, but I don’t think I am actually “late.” How many times must I share this poem I wrote in 2015? I had a day. A good day. Alive. With others in their pain..and my own subsequently. It made me cry thinking about how easy it would be to just stand together as One – in spite of our differences. To care. To work together to make things easier for each other. To believe in ourselves more….

I read something a while back about how many people tend to fall back on or rely upon the idea that “we are only human.” As if to say we are less than…something else. What if we switched the mentality: “we are EXTRAORDINARILY human.” We create so much.

That’s it. The moon is waning and I probably sound like I am whining. Heartfelt post regardless. Let’s lift each other up, people. We all matter so much.

July 11th, 2017.

Mercury.

MERCURY says “I think.”

MERCURY IN ARIES

The Mercury in Aries native has the mind of a racehorse! An individual with their Mercury in Aries may express their intellect through competitiveness, impulsive mental activity, aggressive or assertive speech and body language, or quick thinking in general. Mercury’s motto may be “I think,” but mercurial energy shows up in a number of ways (e.g., the hands, gesturing). The desire for movement is not lacking for the Mercury in Aries native – their thinking tends to be self-oriented, but other-engaged. In other words, the mind wants to keep moving things forward in this energy field. If you’re on board, great; if not, this type will keep moving mentally regardless!

MERCURY IN TAURUS

The Mercury in Taurus native has the mind of a practical builder. To build something, and to build it well, takes careful thought processes (step one; step two; step three…). An individual with their Mercury in Taurus may appear to be lazy with their thinking, but generally it is not laziness – it is the underlying desire to arrive at the “right” decision. In fact, once they do make up their minds about anything, the Taurean fixed energy tends to come off as quite stubborn! Mercury in Taurus is kind of like the common-sense mind…it is the mind that knows what’s “right” through sensual and practical thinking.

MERCURY IN GEMINI

The Mercury in Gemini native has the mind of a collector! Mercury is at home in Gemini (and Virgo), and when it shows up in its home, its energy moves swiftly like its orbit (88 earth days for a full orbit cycle). An individual with their Mercury in Gemini may appear to be quite mentally scattered, but this type of energy is really about picking up bits and pieces of information at a quick pace. And, as quickly as those pieces are gathered, they are equally disseminated into the world – perhaps to make room for new and exciting information! Mercury is considered to be the “messenger,” and when in Gemini, the energy certainly caters to that role. 

MERCURY IN CANCER

The Mercury in Cancer native has an emotional mind, centered around finding balance. Individuals born with this placement tend to come across as emotionally sensitive and caring – a “motherly” type of energy. Of course, this emotionally-centered energy is channeled through that avenue of “I think,” which can make it difficult to discern what they really think about anything! The energy is not fixed, nor mutable; it is a cardinal energy of balance. In general, the Mercury in Cancer native is in tune with the emotional undertones and patterns to thought processes – their own and others. Depending on who they are relating to and how they find balance, their energy may appear quite variable…but with a sensitivity at the core of it all.

MERCURY IN LEO

The Mercury in Leo native has an aura of confidence in their intellect. They may come across as arrogant, bossy, or know-it-alls, but this energy is really about expressing an individual mind with confidence! Leo energy desires to be truly seen, and with Mercury in Leo, the mind and intellect wants to be seen. There is a pride (think LION) with this energy, and the individual born with Mercury in Leo will exert this pride through a unique flair – sometimes dramatic. There is a poignant vibrancy here that takes center stage. As it is with most mercurial energy, the “I think” from a Mercury in Leo native is highly personal and highly opinionated. And, as a fixed sign, the mutable Mercury energy gets an extra boost of creativity coupled with stubbornness…how else would a lion let you know where they truly stand?

MERCURY IN VIRGO

The Mercury in Virgo native has the mind of a grounded and detailed thinker. Mercury is at “home” in Virgo (as well as Gemini), and in Virgo, the mercurial energy lands on the ground. It is practical and methodical and scrupulous in its thinking. The individual with Mercury in Virgo will tend to be quite routine-oriented as anything “out of control” feels like details are missing along the way. Without routine and/or grounding in some way, this energy tends to mimic its twin home of Gemini. Generally, however, the Mercury in Virgo native won’t go there – they are too logical and earth-oriented to find themselves in a mental airspace like that of Gemini. 

MERCURY IN LIBRA

The Mercury in Libra native has a fair, just, and balance-seeking mind. Mercury in Libra basically amps up what Mercury in Gemini begins: it collects and gathers information. Still, at a certain point, it desires the “middle-ground” perspective. As this energy sifts through all the information it is given, it seeks a type of fair-and-just perspective. It is neither open nor closed to any perspective; rather, it acts as a type of mediator or judge energy overall. As a kind of middle-ground energy in general (halfway through the zodiac), Mercury in Libra propels towards leading into the next air sign in the zodiac: Aquarius. The aim from there is to become more purely objective like the Aquarian. Overall, the individual born with Mercury in Libra may tend to be quite diplomatic, charming, and/or indecisive somehow. 

MERCURY IN SCORPIO

The Mercury in Scorpio native has a mind that is extremely in-tune with what is “underneath” various forms of communication. This energy is like that of a therapist, a detective, or anyone else who may be adept at sensing what is truly happening in the mind of any individual. While they may not be totally aligned in seeing the “big picture” (that’s the next water sign’s job, Pisces), they are quite skilled at venturing into the depths of any matter at hand. It may be helpful to understand Scorpio as the opposite to Taurus – the master builder. Scorpio energy tends to be more like the master destroyer – a type of “transformer” energy. In short, the Mercury in Scorpio native desires to get to the bottom of things, which may destroy and/or transform things along the way. Naturally strategic + a highly instinctive (not to be confused with intuitive) nature, the individual with Mercury in Scorpio will certainly leave a mark on thinking itself!

MERCURY IN SAGITTARIUS

The Mercury in Sagittarius native is likely to have a seeker-oriented and freedom-oriented mindset. An individual with their Mercury in Sagittarius may express their intellect through philosophical conversation, spiritual, cultural, metaphysical, or “higher-minded” pursuits. Mercury’s motto is “I think,” but when mercurial energy shows up in an opposite sign, Sagittarius, the thinking becomes less trivial and more broad. Since Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter, the energy becomes both expansive and all-is-possible optimistic at the same time that it becomes highly purpose-of-life serious. The desire for space is significant for the Mercury in Sagittarius native – their thinking tends to seek higher ground where the air is flowing and their thoughts can roam free. In other words, the mind wants to engage with others’ minds for the main purpose of gaining vast wisdom.

MERCURY IN CAPRICORN

The Mercury in Capricorn native tends to behave like a mountain goat – sometimes slow, but certainly with purpose and a goal or two in mind along the way. These individuals are very structured in their thought. They have the wisdom of both Taurus and Virgo on their heels, and they take that wisdom quite seriously. Mercury in Capricorn highlights an authoritative energy – these are the CEO mindsets. Doubt may appear to be prominent in these thinkers, but ultimately it is the careful, thoughtful, and cautious energy inherent in Capricorn that gives this mercurial energy its edge. No doubt, the future-minded Mercury in Capricorn native will have the most practical and attentively weighed “best” path(s) to a goal laid out before it even gets there!

MERCURY IN AQUARIUS

The Mercury in Aquarius native may surprise you…but it just likes to break out of the rut, the rules, and the conventional boxes that appear to exist all together! Aquarius energy is about progress, and the individual with Mercury in Aquarius will think about things through that funnel. The mind can come off as quite contrarian or intellectually superior in a way; however, and again, Mercury in Aquarius is really future-minded and on another density level. It harbors the energy of the two previous air signs – Gemini and Libra – and it expresses itself as quite objective and detached mentally. What any other sign may take as personal, Aquarius does too…but with such objectivity that the personal becomes conflated with the transpersonal quite easily. 

MERCURY IN PISCES

The Mercury in Pisces native will most likely express their mercurial energy through a type of universality. These are the messengers of “spirit.” As the opposite sign to Virgo, a home for Mercury, the Mercury in Pisces individual is fairly dismissive of those Virgoan details – it is “oneness” that they are attuned to and with. Stemming from the other two previous water signs in the cycle (Cancer, Scorpio), the Mercury in Pisces person will exhibit an emotional sensitivity in, with, and through all forms of communication. Their mind is like a sponge, and they tend to absorb each and every facet of whatever they relate to. Everything is a mirror because all is One for these folks. A bird singing may have just as much emotional relevance as their friend’s unexpected death…and their mind relates to it similarly since they equate the mind with Pisces energetically.

The Moon.

The MOOn says “I FEEL + I NEED.”

MOON IN ARIES

The Moon in Aries tends to denote a rather emotionally impulsive individual! The person with their Moon in Aries may express their access to the emotional sphere with certain tools: action-before-thought; an apparent baby-like neediness on the emotional level; a certain spark with direct confrontation emotionally; emotional assertiveness; and the like. People with their Moon in Aries may appear to have anger “issues;” however, and of course, this appearance of energy is not necessarily the case for the individual. Underneath it all, the Moon in Aries is really about a certain learning phase with emotional expression. It’s about turning water into fire – an alchemical process that wants to burn off the emotions as quickly as possible. The need for speedy movement in the emotional realm may show up as “fireworks” for some – think of a shooting star! Regardless, this type of energy is heavily dependent upon the overall amalgamation of energies in the unique chart.

MOON IN TAURUS

The Moon in Taurus tends to depict someone with the need for stability and security. The emotional realm is tied into the physical realm as this individual finds comfort emotionally when their physical world is in “order.” The Moon in Taurus individual needs to experience a lot of earthly pleasures (using their basic senses – particularly touch). They need to know they are safe, secure, and comfortable – and their emotions tend to be expressed harmoniously when they feel they “know” these things. Underneath all of that, though, the Moon in Taurus individual truly needs to experience and express love. They love material comforts – yet, money, stability and security are really rooted in the desire for self-love and love-of-others. Of course, the overall energetic expression of any individual with their Moon in Taurus is needed to fully understand their emotional needs – the general here is just that: general. 

MOON IN GEMINI

The Moon in Gemini generally expresses its emotion through communication, duality and paradox. The emotions tend to get filtered through the intellect, monkey mind + gossip, and other mental states and processes. An individual with their Moon in Gemini will need to talk, think, talk, and then think and talk some more. Gemini is the first of the air triangle, and with the Moon there, the mind and emotion are linked in a certain form. Essentially, the Moon in Gemini individual will be in the beginning stages of uniting mind and emotion. Moreover, the mental function is connected to both Libra (balancing perspectives) and Virgo (second sign ruled by Mercury). What makes Gemini distinct is its focus on the duality of experience(s) – this is the “twins” sign. The next air sign, Libra, will tend to be more focused on peace and mediation after already intuitively gathering duality/paradox. Virgo will tend to be more focused on grounding the emotion – making it “practical.” The Moon in Gemini will simply be in the gathering-of-information stage; this energy lends itself to clear communication of emotion on a highly individualized level. Get your unique reading here!

MOON IN CANCER

The Moon in Cancer is at home! The Moon rules Cancer, so whenever the Moon actually shows up in Cancer for any individual, the energy flows without certain layers that other signs possess. The easiest way to understand the Moon in Cancer individual is to look to and understand a woman’s menstrual cycle. The Moon is linked with this cycle (28.5 days), and there is a certain ebb and flow for how emotions come up for expression. Each woman’s cycle is different, just as each individuals’ cycle of life is different; however, there is an underlying connection to the Moon and the tides for those born with this placement. Regardless of sex or gender, this energy tends to tell that the emotional needs are in aim of stabilization, peace, and inner harmony. Moon in Cancer natives want to feel free to express their emotions, but they also do so with an intent for internal calm. A particularly useful tool for these folks is to notice the cycles of the moon as it correlates to life/emotion in general. For women in particular, I recommend checking out this site! 

MOON IN LEO

The Moon in Leo individual tends to hold dramatic energy! Drama, though, ought not be boxed into any “positive” or “negative” connotations whatsoever. Moon in Leo energy is about the next step in the cycle for fire energy: childlike enthusiasm, capturing individual light, performing and the arts, and creative self expression in general. This energy can show up in any actor/actress, musician/singer, poet, dancer, artist – whatever. It can also show up in the adult who has a strong child-centered mentality or Being. Some feel there is a difference between being childish and child-like…the Moon in Leo native may tend to express themselves in either or both forms. Regardless, the underlying energy to the Moon in Leo native is one of fun, play, and exuberance. It takes the emotional realm and expresses it at a highly personalized level – most often for others to notice and relate to somehow. It is not about recognition, generally; it is simply about being seen. There are always varying motives and needs to any individual, which can be further explored through individual chart reading. Ultimately, though, Moon in Leo energy wants to express its feelings on life to the fullest!

MOON IN VIRGO

The Moon in Virgo energy lends itself to grounding of both the mental and emotional realms. The Moon in Virgo native will tend to be highly “logical” with their emotional intake and output. The energy does not necessarily show up as aloof, but to the emotionally-oriented individual, a Moon in Virgo native may come across as highly analytical in their holding for emotional space. That is not to say that these types cannot hold the space for emotion – in fact, quite often, they are of service to self/others on any and all levels. They just seem to be oriented towards “fixing” things, so they may tend to jump to potential solutions without processing the actual emotional undercurrents first and foremost. Regardless, the person born with their Moon in Virgo will likely have other Mercurial energy lending aid to how they process and express emotion.

MOON IN LIBRA

The Moon in Libra tends to seek balance in their emotional expression. These natives will likely possess great mediator qualities, particularly when it comes to emotional disputes/battles. The individual with their Moon in Libra may express their access to the emotional realm with use of the mind/intellect and “proper” perspective. These types are quite charming since their emotional atmosphere caters to any and all expression of emotion; they simply want to talk shop and find equilibrium with whatever is brought forth. The Moon in Libra native can do this dance both internally and externally; however, they tend to seek engagement on this level through another person – particularly, and generally, some “special” someone. Ruled by Venus, these folks desire harmony, balance, and love in their emotional interactions. As an opposite sign to Aries (which can be more fire-y and combative), the Libra Moon energy tends to find its way out of fighting and into some sort of mutually beneficial compromise. 

MOON IN SCORPIO

The Moon in Scorpio tends to desire intense interactions. The Moon in this water sign (outside of its natural home, Cancer), basically exacerbates that initial “home” of emotional expression. In other words, the Moon in Scorpio native might be indicative of someone that finds comfort in the intense, the transformative, the sexual, and the overall depth(s) to emotional exploration. While the Moon in Cancer individual seeks emotional equilibrium and peace, the Moon in Scorpio native tends to seek transformation of that supposed stability. This person may seem emotionally destructive in some form or another; however, the underlying intent is to totally exonerate the old and bond deeply with that something “new.” These individuals are quite emotionally-centered regardless. They want to get to the root of things for many particular reasons. Ultimately, the best way to understand and explore this type of energy is through a natal chart reading.

MOON IN SAGITTARIUS

The Moon in Sagittarius tends to portray the individual in need of space and freedom! The Moon in Sagittarius native may likely express their emotions through higher truths and ideals, through spirituality, through long-distance travel, and more. This energy is like a collaboration of Pisces, Leo, and Cancer energy in vision. How? Well, like Pisces, this energy is highly spiritual; the difference is that it is not necessarily centered in the realm of “oneness.” Instead, the Moon in Sagittarius person may need to be constantly stimulated with various possibilities and paths – it is the seeker (with the emotional realm driving things forward) of meaning and “higher source.” This energy is also like that of Leo in certain ways as they are both fire signs. The difference is that Sagittarius is the last fire sign of the zodiac; it has integrated and culminated how to alchemize fire and water (spirit and emotion) quite well. Interestingly, this energy holds a bit of those Cancer qualities in some ways too – while it does not necessarily seek the quiet solitude of “home,” it does tend to find its “home” in new cultural experiences, retreats and/or monasteries, and the like. The native with Moon in Sagittarius tends to be an ambivert emotionally; in other words, they will be with you, but they may need to take off and be elsewhere too!

MOON IN CAPRICORN

The Moon in Capricorn tends to be quite responsible with emotion. Many, many people outside of this energetic quality know that they are ultimately responsible for their emotional well-being; however, the Moon in Capricorn tends to live in this space. In fact, often times, these natives tend to take on others’ emotional worlds with some sense of responsibility there as well. Of course, this example is not always the case! While this emotional energy tends to lend itself to sacrifice and martyrdom, many individuals with placement in their natal chart simply know how to explore and build their emotional interactions with caution, discernment, and grace. The Moon in Capricorn native will certainly be a “rock” when it comes to emotion; at the same time, they may appear to be stoic, serious, or emotionally-void all together. Overall, this Moon energy depends on other components to the individual’s blueprint and Being. Ruthlessness and a lack of “big-picture” energy can show us Capricorn’s detriments. Still, these types understand the emotional qualities and undercurrents that come with a steady climb to any and all peaks.

MOON IN AQUARIUS

The Moon in Aquarius individual is definitely that: an individual! In a specific type of paradox to its opposite sign (Leo), the Moon in Aquarius native may be prone to aloofness, detachment, and a type of scientific-like emotional expression. Yet, there seems to be an identifiable uniqueness of emotional expression as well. While the individual with their Moon in Leo may appear to collect drama somehow, the individual with their Moon in Aquarius may experience drama more objectively. This energy is connected with archetypes like the loner, the outcast, the alien, and the eccentric. In relationship, this energy tends to show up in similarly unconventional (yet quite progressive) forms: long-distance relationships, open marriages, polyamorous relationships, etc. Regardless, and for the Moon in Aquarius native, there is an emotional desire for something “out-of-the-norm” – whether in relationship to Self and/or Other.

MOON IN PISCES

The Moon in Pisces native is highly sensitive to the emotional realm. Pisces energy, in general, tends to absorb its environment; the Moon in Pisces tends to absorb its emotional environment more acutely. Individuals with their Moon in Pisces are generally highly intuitive; if there are other energies that shift that in their natal chart, they tend to be (at the very least) around others or seeking others with that same type of energy. They NEED this energy – it is not only part of their emotional make-up, but also it is apart of their spiritual path somehow. Well, at least that’s how it tends to get funneled into their Being. The individual with their Moon in Pisces will certainly understand your emotional world. They tend to feel like “all is One,” and in their emotional expression, they may appear to play mirror to you somehow. Take note: these types may see “all as One,” but at the same time, they may or may not be capable of truly connecting with you on a purely individual level! Still, somehow, this is truly an empathetic and sympathetic placement for the Moon to express its energies.